Let's get this show on the road.... to recovery!!

So, Thursday April 24^th, 2014 was going so well until I got a call from and unknown number. “Hello Andrea, this is Dr. ______.” “ oh hey Dr. ______! How are you?” “I’m doing ok, but I have some not so good news for you. You’re MRI results are back and they show lesions in your spine, hips, femur, and collar bone.” “…so… *fighting tears*… my cancer is back?” “Yes, looks that way… I’m so so sorry…” (of course there was a whole lot more medical talk and he named the specific vertebrae and all that, but my brain wasn’t absorbing it…)

They are suspecting (third) recurrence of bone cancer. One of the lesions on my spine is upper, like, close to my neck. It is what is suspected of causing the numbness and pain in my arms/hands/fingers that keep me up hours through the night. It started out with my hands falling asleep when I would do things like type on my computer or talk on the phone, but it would go away as soon as I let my hands hang down at my sides. This started up in maybe January or February, and since then it's gotten to where it's nearly a constant numbness in my fingers and pain in my upper arm.

Although the MRI results say that I have bone cancer, there is always that margin of error. My mom is suspicious of the way this is presenting itself. A lot of our former go-to doctors are saying bone cancer does not normally come back the way it is showing on my MRI, with a bunch of little tumors, without my lungs having been affected… so we are hoping against all odds that we are that tiny percentage that has been misread.

We have gotten a first opinion from a sarcoma doctor here at Indiana University hospital, but we’re still not convinced. There were some things said that just didn’t sit right. So we are seeking out second and third opinions from MD Anderson in Houston and Seattle Cancer Care Alliance (SCCA).
In the meantime, the kids and I have just been enjoying the company of my mom, who has been here nearly every day since the diagnosis, helping us clean and organize and cook while I’m still feeling fairly well and things are still moving fairly slowly. We have tackled a lot of the kitchen and the bathrooms. Next on our list is purging and organizing the boxes! She’s such a blessing in our lives!

I think the hardest part about this has been trying to accept what will happen, as far as having to give up the kids… We have grown so attached to them over the past 7 months. When they first came to us, I went a little crazy with all the noise and chaos and tantrums and little fingers getting into things they shouldn’t be. But now, I can’t imagine our lives without them… I spoke with M about everything that’s going on, just because I didn’t want her to get blindsided with something this big. During church last week she looked up at me with tears in her eyes and said, “Please don’t leave me. I don’t want you to go…”  GAH! Shatter my heart!! I’ve been praying hard for this part to be taken care of, and there have been people coming out of nowhere who would be potentially able to take these kids. One being M’s bus driver, who actually lives in the neighborhood across Harding St. from us! She’s been so sweet. I let her know when we found out, because at that time I thought things would move quickly, so I told her bus driver that I didn’t know if M would be on the bus that coming Monday. She later called me and said that it broke her heart to hear that, she cried on her way from dropping the kids off at school, back to the bus barn. She told me that M has really touched her heart. She told me stories about how she (bus driver) would offer M the tablet she would bring for the kids to play with, and M would refuse it, saying she needed to read her scriptures! Such a sweetheart! The bus driver said she was really impressed by that and that she wanted to help out. She gave me her phone number and asked me to pass it along to my DCS supervisor. I really like her, I can just tell that she has a good heart.

We’ve felt such an outpouring of love and support since this has come out. I cannot even tell you how much of a blessing it has been, the meals brought over right when needed them, the phone calls, emails, Facebook messages, and so forth. It humbles me that there are so many who care for us like you do and are in our corner of the ring during this fight. I pray for you all and thank our Heavenly Father daily for placing so MANY amazing people in our lives. He continues to watch over us and guide us to those who earthly angels who can and will help meet our needs. I cannot adequately express my gratitude!